11-01-2008

Transitions

Young Adulthood
This summer Alexandra is 20 ½ years old and I decided it’s a good time to start looking at ‘developmental day centers’. Ideally this is the place where Alexandra will be spending at least part of her days after she graduates from high school at 22. I have heard some of the centers have waiting lists, and I really had no idea what to expect so I wanted to see what these centers were like. It’s been an education.
I first made a ‘wish list’ of everything I wanted in a center for Alexandra. Alexandra’s social worker made appointments at centers for us to visit. We then began our ‘quest’ (if you will) for the perfect center for Alexandra. It was always the three of us who went on these visits, Alexandra, Alexandra’s social worker and me. After the visit to the first center I realized how important it was to be really firm with Alexandra’s needs. The reason: the first center was seriously lacking in resources. For example, recreation for the consumers (as they were referred to) was watching “The Price Was Right”!
The second center completely opposite to the first. If Alexandra could have started that day I would have signed her up! The center had everything that was on my list! It was incredible. A few days later we went to a third place. This center didn’t have the same resources as the second, but the consumers were doing more than watching TV. However, this center also accommodated consumers that had behavioral problems.
Even though the director assured me the personnel were trained to handle situations if they were to occur I just didn’t feel comfortable with it. Alexandra has no way of defending herself if someone were to go out of control and in her area. This was also something I didn’t know before, some of the centers taking severely handicapped people also do take people with behavioral problems. As I said earlier, it’s been an education.
Here is my ‘wish list’ for Alexandra:
1. Physical therapy a couple of days a week.
2. Music therapy every day.
3. A walk outdoors, everyday (weather permitting).
4. Participate in a field trip a couple a days a week.
5. A snack regularly fed to her in the morning, and lunch fed to her regularly at
Noon.
6. Participate in any craft activity the other consumers are doing, by being ‘motored’
through it.
7. It is imperative Alexandra not be ignored. She is quiet, and she doesn’t demand
attention so she can sometimes be overlooked – this just cannot happen.
8. Her diaper checked and changed (if necessary) every 1 ½ to 2 hours.
9. Close to home since I will be the one providing transportation to and from the center.
A couple of weeks after the third visit we went to a fourth center in our town. This center has been in business for fifteen years, but has always accommodated more ‘able’ bodied handicapped people. When we visited them they were very excited because they were expanding and starting a new division to handle severely handicapped people. It sounded very promising, however, it is all in the planning stages and until I see something concrete I cannot make a decision. I don’t want Alexandra to be the first person. So, as it stands the second center is still the best.
I have names of parents who have daughters in these centers and I will be calling them and talking to them asking the pros and cons of having their daughters in the centers. It is not a law to put Alexandra in a developmental center each day. However, I know she would become very bored and complacent if all she did was stay at home. It wouldn’t be good for either of us.
Everyone needs to have something to do every day. It gives us purpose. Our daughters are no exception…